Published by JPLand on 23 Jul 2008 at 11:39 am
I Want Out
I’ve decided that I don’t want to be an engineer anymore. It’s not the subject matter. I really enjoy that. Workload? Nah, it’s not that bad. I could stand to be a little more challenged at times, but I’m content. The pay? Well, yeah, I’d love to make a billion or two a year, but not that either. So what is it?
It’s the wardrobe. Boy, engineers dress nerdy. I should offer a bit of disclosure before I start, though. When I was in college, my roommate, Seth, could wear just about anything and make it look cool. One day he went to class wearing a couch cushion and toilet paper and looked like he was on the cover of GQ. I tend to be the polar opposite when it comes to wearing clothes. Give me a tuxedo and I’ll turn it into a $3,000 girl repellent. So you should know that I’m no fashion guru; however, I do have some advice for all of my colleagues:
Sometimes I look around my office, which is chocked full of engineers, and I wonder if I’m trapped in 1974. What in the world is with all of the solid-color, short-sleeve, button-up shirts? Is the intent to say “I’d like to wear a formal shirt, but my arms get really hot during the day“? Only slightly better than the solid shirts are the patterned versions of the same thing. I guess I understand where the guys are coming from. Sometimes, you feel like a golf shirt is too casual. Then again, a nice dress shirt might be too much. But the choice that you have made is not a compromise between the two…NAY! It is a declaration to all of the world that your social skills are severely lacking. Listen, guys, within 15 seconds of starting a conversation with you, most people will have already figured out that you’re a nerd. There’s no need to openly declare it prior to having a discussion. At least let innocent bystanders think that you might be a normal person.
Most times, I wear a long-sleeve, button-up shirt. I think that it looks professional…not to mention that I’m always ready for impromptu meetings with people who may appreciate full length sleeves. On occasion, however, I may want to dress down. So, if I don’t feel like wearing a golf shirt, I’ll wear a dress shirt, but “casualize” it a little by rolling the sleeves up. This gives the professional look, but allows me to be a bit free. (Note: The degree of sleeve rolling varies depending on the fit of the shirt and the mood I’m in.) It just looks 150 times better than what some of my coworkers are choosing.
So, engineers out there….please heed my call. The short-sleeve, button-ups should never be a choice for you. Now, Seth could pull it off, but he’d leave the shirt unbuttoned, untucked, and have a solid color t-shirt underneath. But he’s Seth and you are not. (unless, of course, you are Seth….in which case…Hey Seth!) When you’re choosing your clothes and you’re sure that today is an appropriate time to wear that short-sleeve, button-up, just remember this helpful hint: NO!
Alana on 23 Jul 2008 at 11:53 am #
Oh, John. I’m really, really sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you are not fooling anybody with your rolled up sleeves. My husband (a math geek) does the same thing. But the truth is that you guys ooze geekiness all over the place. You just can’t help yourselves. Maybe it’s the spaced-out look you get when you are solving a problem. Or the pasty white skin that comes from too many hours spent under florescent lighting staring at strange shapes on a computer screen. Or maybe it’s that pencil you have sticking out of your pocket. Whatever it is, there’s definitely something about you guys that says “nerd.” But here’s another piece of news: I LOVE MY NERDY HUSBAND! So maybe you should embrace this part of yourself and work to instill your daughters with a sense of nerdiness as well. The more nerds you make, the less like outcasts you become!
JPLand on 23 Jul 2008 at 12:30 pm #
Oh, the sleeves work. I look just like Jim Halpert (pictured above). AND, I’ll have you know that we do not look at “weird” shapes on the computer. They are beautiful mathematical forms.
Cheryl G on 23 Jul 2008 at 12:46 pm #
Once Seth said to Fadi, “you know man sweat pants are not supposed to look like spandex” and then would question me as to how I let him dress like that. Well back then I did not buy his clothes and today I do. But let the man loose and plaid/stripes combo here he comes. I now must even lay the kids clothes out too. If not he tries to dress them in the latest nerdy get up. While on Maternity a lady at church asked Fadi what happened to Eli’s outfit and he just told her Cheryl didn’t lay out the clothes!!! Enough said.
Carmen on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:26 pm #
My John’s firm is actually really casual: jeans and golf shirts. I’m ashamed to admit he has a pocket protector, but he doesn’t wear it for fear of getting his ass kicked.
GG on 23 Jul 2008 at 3:49 pm #
All this professional fashion concern from the SON who use to care less about how he or anybody else dressed. One day wearing a Hawaian Print shirt and plaid pants while riding a bike he ask, ” Mama this doesn’t match does it?” To which I replied, “No it doesn’t!” Shallow thinker responded, “Well, it FEELS good!” and rode all over on his bike for all to see his new fashion style. Nerdy? No. Redneck? YES