Published by JPLand on 18 Sep 2008 at 11:18 am
Redo
I’ve decided that I don’t want to be an engineer anymore. The past few weeks have been a warp speed and the outlook for the weekend isn’t spectacular. So, I’m putting my faith in you guys to make me president. If for some reason America wises up to me and the presidency doesn’t pan out, here are some other options that I’ll consider:
- Movie Star - one of the rich ones, though. Not one of those struggling-to-make-a-dime types.
- Football Announcer - I’m constantly amazed at how stupid sports announcers are. I could get paid to be that stupid.
Not a Football Coach - Ever notice how college & NFL coaches get a job paying them tons of money? Inevitably, they stink and the organization pays them a massive buyout to not coach anymore. They could pay me a lot less to not coach their team. If they need some proof that I’m worthy of not coaching, then I don’t mind running the program into the ground, but they’d be a lot better off taking my word for it. Since most buyouts are in the range of the millions, I offer my non-coaching services for $450,000 a year.- Not a CEO - same explanation as above, but with my inability to handle funds instead of handle footballs. Salary is commensurate with the company’s available funds.
- Professional Athlete - I have the body for it. I might as well have the cash.
- Retired Millionaire - This one is my preference. I’m not sure how to get into this field, but it definitely sounds like the job for me.
So there are my ideas. Got any other ones that you think I could do better?
Alana on 18 Sep 2008 at 8:42 pm #
Retired millionaire? Ha! Small potatoes. I aim to be a retired BILLIONAIRE! But don’t worry. You can ride in my private jet anytime and swim in my Olympic pool. I’ll even lend you one of my houses.
Alana on 18 Sep 2008 at 8:42 pm #
Although I’ll have to pay someone to count them so I can make sure I have enough to share with all of my friends.
JPLand on 18 Sep 2008 at 8:46 pm #
Retired BILLIONaire?! Geez, Alana. Here I am thinking logical and reasonable and you go and make a joke out of the whole thing. Some people just can’t understand that I am a serious person with serious needs. (My psychologist agrees with that statement)