Shallow Thinker

For a few months, my cell phone has had a slight glitch.  When I answer the phone, the earpiece volume is insanely loud and within 2-3 seconds, it automatically drops down to the normal volume.  If someone is calling me from a library, this isn’t a problem because there is no noise on their end to be amplified.  (This never happens.)  On the other hand, if someone is calling me with 2 screaming kids in the background and I answer the phone, my eardrum is nearly busted. (This is what happens every time my wife calls.)  I put up with this annoyance long enough and decided to get it fixed while my phone was still under warranty.

Attempt #1: I took my phone to the Verizon store across the street from where I work.  I piddled about looking at the new phones while I waited and after about 10 minutes, they called my name.  I went to the counter, explained my problem in detail and watched it disappear into the lifeless expression of the clerk’s face.  She took my phone from me and went to the back of the store.  After about 10 more minutes of piddling about, she came back out with my phone and…..a post it note.  She said that they couldn’t do anything with my phone and that I would have to call the number on the note in order to do something.  Eh, fair enough, I suppose.  I took the number and left.

Attempt #2: I called the number, got to the technical support person, and explained my problem.  This gentleman said that he could replace my phone, however, if they got my broken phone back and couldn’t replicate the problem, they’d charge me full price.  Nay, Nay, I said.  “My phone is under warranty and I want it fixed.  Fix it!”  He told me that the best solution would be to go to my nearest store location and have them look at it.  I explained attempt #1.  He said that these people could too fix the phone.  So, my options were to either risk having to pay full price or go back to the place that couldn’t fix it in the first place.  He had me try a couple of things to see if we could fix the problem, but we couldn’t verify if it was fixed or not because he kept calling me without kids yelling in his background.  I volunteered to send my children to his office for the sake of the experiment.  He declined.  We decided to wait a week or two and see if this fixed it.

Attempt #3: Our fix didn’t work.  Today, I mosied back over to the retail location.  I put my name in the hat and meandered around for a bit while I waited.  (This is when I realized that some of the phones in the show room are activated.  You can send a text from one to the other.  If you find the number for one, you can go to another and wait until a customer is looking at the original one and then freak ‘em out.  Go on….try it.)  Eventually, my name is called and I go through my story again.  I see the girl reaching for the post-it notes and I decide to go ahead and cut her short.  I explained Attempt #1, Attempt #2, and that I’m now here at Attempt #3.  Fortunately enough, this young lady (April at the Centerville store!) seemed to have some smarts.  She gives me the same phone number as before, but then she types something into the computer.  She tells me that she has no way of fixing the phone and has no way of getting me a new one and that I have to deal with them over the phone.  I explain to her that I’ve jumped through these hoops before and would prefer that she call the people and that between the two of them, they decide who will help me.  She told me that she will make a note on my account that I need a new phone and that I shouldn’t have to pay for it, but that I have to call the number to talk with them to get it worked out.  So, I leave attempt #3 with the same thing in my hands as attempt #1, but there is supposedly a note on my account now.

Attempt #4: I call the same number and quickly reach another tech support agent. I run through the entire story of my previous attempts, all the stuff I’ve done, what version my software is…blah, blah, blah.  She looks and says, “I see a note on your account.”  (Attagirl, April!)  This lady has me check some more settings and do some more tests.  She is smart enough to realize, though, that she and I can’t replicate the problem because she has no background noise.  I told her that she could sing or something, but she declined the opportunity and opted to take my word for it.  At the end of our conversation, she had put a new phone in a box and shipped it out to me.  It should be here next week.

So…what have we learned today?  Verizon does indeed have the most reliable network in the business.  Anytime you have a problem, you can count on them to point you in another direction!  I kid, I kid.  Today’s experience was much better than the first try.  Both ladies understood that I was having some trouble, and they did everything that they could to help me.  So, for now, I’m happy with the way it worked out.  They might not have solved my problem, but they came up with a solution that we can all live with.  Unless, of course, the phone they send me is one of those pink ones.  I can’t do pink.